Our approach to ending the stalemate is 3 fold:
Empathy, Connection, and Boundaries

Ending Power Struggles and Building Connection

Hello Beautiful,

Whether it’s parenting a strong willed child or relating to a belligerent adult, power struggles can sap us of our energy and bring us to our knees in frustration. I want to share a few insights that have helped me in these situations, with the hope that they will aid you in your relationships….especially the challenging ones!

Ending the power struggle…

If we have a strong willed child and we attempt to dig our heals in even deeper or longer than they do, we are modeling the behavior that we are asking them to stop. I have come to see “strong willed children” as something else….namely “deeply committed to a cause.” This is, potentially, a very good thing. Yet, it requires some thoughtful engagement to navigate the intensity that it brings.

The key is to connect to the value behind the issue that is on the surface. When we can access what all the emotion and reaction is “protecting” we can better address the core concerns. The surface issue can better be navigated when the deeper issue is understood, acknowledged, and honored.

We begin by softening our heart and taking a few breaths. When we are able to be open enough to listen, we can prepare the soil of our hearts with some empathy. We might explore what they are likely facing and feeling and take a moment to honor the validity of that—even if how they are doing it is hurtful. When we no longer feel the need to fight and we can open to their experience in a genuine way, we are now ready to relate directly to them more successfully.

We might be able to initiate a conversation and hear more about their concerns. What are their priorities? What do they need and want? If we can make them feel seen and understood, they will respond differently and a creative solution that meets both our needs/standard and theirs can better be found. Removing the adversarial tone is the key to finding a win-win solution.

Our approach to ending the stalemate is 3 fold-

Empathy, Connection, and Boundaries

If we have been able to model empathy and express a genuine desire to create a win-win with the other person, we likely now have their ear to express our needs and desires as well. Hopefully, we have built the necessary good will by “going first” in pursuing their point of view and they are now ready to reciprocate.

Sometimes there is history in the relationship that makes one or both parties default to an adversarial relational pattern. Exploring the need for healing in the relationship is key if the dynamic is ongoing. Healing the root cause is the best way to not keep encountering this challenging way of interacting.

If there isn’t any history there, it’s an act of generosity of spirit to engage this person in a tender and constructive way. Maybe, you will be a key factor in helping them feel less hostile. At a minimum, you can keep from being brought into a power struggle that drains you and brings out the worst in you both.

Lastly, comes creating, communicating, and following through on boundaries. We need to be very clear on what we are asking for and communicate it to the other person. If they are able to agree to those terms, that’s wonderful! If they cannot, then you need to communicate what you will do in that situation.

Boundaries are not about telling other people what to do. They are about saying what we are going to do—and following through. It’s up to us to protect our time, energy, and belongings. If others aren’t willing to honor our requests, we owe it to ourselves to create a follow up plan and act on it.

Relating to people who are a little (or a lot) prickly can be challenging. But, if we use it as an opportunity to practice self awareness, align with empathy and kindness, and respect boundaries for ourselves and others, it can be a blessing in disguise. We all benefit from the “workout” of enhanced clarity, re-shaping our relational tendencies into useful patterns, and honoring boundaries.

It’s high level work, but the rewards are immense. To be able to de-escalate tension, lead with kindness, and be proactive instead of reactive is Gold. I hope you are inspired to go out and try these steps in a challenging relationship. Please let me know how it goes!

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

A monthly pause will refresh, inspire, and guide you for the month ahead

Your Favorite Week of the Month – Really!

Hello Beautiful

Over a decade ago, I began a deeper dive into understanding “that time of the month” as it relates to optimizing wellness. It turns out, many cultures, throughout history have honored the time of a woman’s menstrual cycle as a time of rest, healing, and spiritual rejuvenation. This month, I would like to share with your about how you can support yourself during your period and transform that time into your favorite week of the month.

First, let’s acknowledge, that as women, our hormone levels go through 4 distinct phases each month. Each one has challenges and gifts within it. If we “turn our sail” so to speak , in order to “catch the wind” rather than try to paddle the boat against the wind, we save ourselves wasted effort and can benefit from the aid of nature’s direction.

The week of our period, is a week our body is giving us information about the health of  our liver (sore breasts  and breakouts indicate a congested liver), our gut health (bloating indicates an imbalance in the intestine), and how clear our detox pathways are (water retention, lower energy, and cramping all indicate exaggerated hormonal responses that show stress in the system). When we take our monthly PMS and period symptoms not as mere annoyances but as valuable information, we can take specific supportive action in service of rebalancing our system.

Changing to pasture raised, hormone free animal products can have a dramatic effect on PMS symptoms. When I was a teenager, I began my health journey and this is one of the first things I changed. I was amazed to no longer experience tender breasts and cramping within just a few months of making this important change.

Honestly, it’s a game changer. When PMS week and period week add up to a roughly half the month. If you are dealing with these common symptoms, it can make you feel bummed to have a period at all. That’s not how it was meant to be! We have hundreds of cycles in a lifetime and each one is a chance to better partner with our body for a monthly check up of sorts.

We can re-frame our discomfort as the equivalent of a smoke alarm going off -not a pleasant sound, but it gives us an important warning. There are many books that have been released over the past decade detailing even more about how to “read” your bodies symptoms and then take appropriate steps to better meet it’s needs. I encourage you to further educate yourself on your own body’s feedback and how you can respond with skill to come to better health each month.

When our “time of the month” isn’t characterized by pain and discomfort, it can then be what it was designed to be: a time of refreshment. Yes! Taking the first 3 days of your cycle and downshifting your intensity of exercise, getting more sleep, and doing some reflection are key ways to utilize this time as a monthly re-set.

For women who aren’t cycling, I encourage you to pick a regular 3 day pause each month. The new moon is an excellent time to align with the end of one cycle and prepare for the beginning of the next. Whenever you choose to take your Sacred Rest, know that it will yield exponential results if observed regularly. The whole family can take one together. This is a beautiful opportunity to bow to the Creator’s design of cyclical living and intentional rest.

Here are some more of my favorite restorative rituals:

1. Going to ged earlier and sleeping in is key. What a luxury to really get well rested for a few days! Use the time to deeply pause and support your body.

2. Less screen time and more quiet is beneficial. Use the time to minimize inputs and instead tune into your body, your emotions, mind, and Spirit. What are you hearing? What do you need to know? What do you need to shift?

3. Gentle daily movement rather than intense workouts are best. Take walks (preferably in nature). Do some gentle stretching. Swim or dance. Do some light weights or body weight only workouts. The point is to support your circulatory and lymphatic systems with gentle activity that improves circulation without overworking.

4. Reflect on last months wins and progress in key areas. Journal a few pages about what has moved forward or completed.

5. Pray and meditate to gain clarity on your priorities for doing and on new ways of Being for the month ahead. Are you feeling led to follow through and complete key projects? Are you being asked to be more flexible and less resistant to challenges? Each month I like to find a word/phrase that I wish to embody and 2-3 key projects to move forward.

These are a few of my key practices, but I have others I include as well. I hope you will create a list for yourself and give yourself the permission for a 72 hour reset each month. It is truly life changing! You will have less burnout, better health, and find that your growth in each area of your life accelerates as you give monthly attention to assessing what it and moving intentionally towards the progress you desire.

Start with 2 or 3 practices so you aren’t overwhelmed. Gradually, refine your approach. Some months you can rest and reflect luxuriously. Other months, non negotiable commitments coincide with your period and you may have a smaller set of practices.

Remeber, you can always take an extra gentle approach with yourself, and look for little ways to put into practice what you wish you could do on a grander scale. Don’t let this be something you judge yourself for doing poorly. Choose to use the time to better observe your state (body, soul, mind, Spirit) and make strategic adjustments for the next cycle.

Consider my Sacred Rest course as resource to support you in this effort. Helping women learn the language of their Being and re-orient to their True North is my passion. I offer 20 minute free discovery calls to see if personal mentorship sessions would be a good fit for you. Feel free to reach out and schedule a call with me to discuss your goals.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

Beauty is not just something we see, or even feel, it’s meant to be something we embody and live

Living A Beautiful Life

Hello Beautiful,

I would love to tell you a story about a magical evening in England years ago. It imprinted the compounded value of layering an artfully designed environment, extraordinary conversation, and an artful hostess…

It was a damp London evening. The Autumn leaves fell on the historic streets and the light began to transition from late afternoon into evening. My friend and I ventured around the corner and up the stone stairs of the elegant abode. We were welcomed into the classic foyer-candlelight dancing off the sconces and plush rugs under our feet.

The smell of a rich curry wafted from the kitchen. The tinkling of last minute preparations to complete the beautifully set table drew our attention down the hall and towards the dining room. What I saw, astounded me.

The dining room was an octagon of glass walls and ceilings with candles reflecting off every angle. The twinkling reflections of light everywhere were surreal. Enjoying a meal at the large round table, set beautifully with china and silver, in this environment, was a sensory feast.

What made the evening even more remarkable was the conversation around the table. An ambassador, an internationally acclaimed painter, an elite athlete, a philosopher, and an entrepreneur all shared in the evenings lively banter about the meaning of life, wild adventures, questions we held within our hearts, and plenty of lively stories and laughter.

As breathtaking as the venue was, it was the stage. Had we gotten on stage and been petty, sullen, or argumentative, the evening would have been disappointing or worse. The beautiful architecture, the carefully considered interior design, and the lovely menu served so elegantly couldn’t have made up for such human foibles.

For 7 years of my early adulthood, I worked in industries that create beauty through design. During my work in fashion (as a model in San Francisco and New York) and in interior design (in  a beautiful showroom and extraordinary properties around the fabled Sonoma and Napa Valley), I was surrounded with glamour, privilege, and beauty.

I loved the artistic process-the collaboration of elite skill sets brought out extraordinary talents and created breathtaking projects. Being around beauty is inspiring! The endless fountain of creativity is a source of wonder and delight. There’s always something new to appreciate.

Over time I saw the fact that the “stage” of beauty and inspiration was set but the “play” of the lives of so many people who enjoyed those settings was bereft of meaning and beauty.  I decided to transition from working in industries that create beauty for our lives towards helping people create beauty in their lives.

Beauty as a lived experience involves personal transformation and growth. Having the energy and flourishing in our body to enjoy those moments of sensory delight is key. Healing our relationship to time (by making peace with our schedules and making time for peace in our schedules) is a key part of this. Clarifying your life’s purpose and remodeling your calendar to be an accurate mirror of what you say you love is also key.

Luxurious Minimalism as a mindset that can be adopted to simplify in order to amplify enjoyment can be learned. Healing and integrating our life story so that we tenderly hold our pain in an embrace of redemptive meaning is an option. Healing our Spirit, nourishing our body, and creating an intentional life are all keys to living a beautiful life.

Now, I love helping clients unite their lived experience of intentionality and inner harmony within the most inspiring and delightful environment they can create. The meaning and the context in which life is lived both combine to elevate the day to day fulfillment of our lived experience.

Beauty is not just seen— it is felt. It is felt as harmony and inspiration. When we are in harmony with our life’s purpose and our life story….we live as beauty. We all crave beauty because it feeds our being in the deepest ways. The harmony of body, soul, and spirit multiply our beauty.

It’s my passion to help people grow into the fullness of their beauty and live in alignment with their purpose. Beauty is not just something we see, or even feel, it’s meant to be something we live.

Just like that magical dinner party in London, each of our lives is filled with moments we can fill with connection, curiosity, and meaning. A life intentionally lived is a beautiful thing.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

“With each step in the direction of Grace, you will find abundant evidence that this is the way you have always wanted to be, to live, and to relate. “

Becoming More Feminine

Hello Beautiful,

One of my favorite areas to coach women around is how to recover (or enhance) their femininity. I love being a woman and I grow more feminine each year. In a household of men (my husband and I have 6 sons!), I decided long ago, that the more male energy I was surrounded by, the more I needed to double down on my femininity. I saw that it was no use (and no fun) to try to operate in the way they did.

I needed a different approach altogether. I saw that we all enjoyed me more when I was sourcing my authority from a different way of being. Over the years, I have found many ways to dive deeper into my femininity. I have worked to remodel my approaches that are “force on force” ways of navigating the areas of parenting or marriage. As I more deeply embody my feminine strength, I find more connection to myself and in my relationships. I also find more ease and flow in my day to day life. This is the power of the feminine energy…to connect, to inspire, and be a force multiplier.

It seems to me that when women entered the work force and leadership in the private and public centers, many felt they had to leave their greatest strengths at the door in order to conform to expectations and gain respect. This is understandable but also unsustainable. When we allow what we think others want (or what they may actually want) to override our fundamental expression of Being and reshape us, we forfeit our greatest assets.

As I mentioned earlier, some of the greatest strengths of the feminine are to connect, to inspire, and to uplift. I would like to elaborate a bit on these traits and how they are so essential to our world. When we embody and inspire these traits, we lead, follow, and collaborate at our best.

Connection

A woman is a powerful connector. We are naturally more socially collaborative and tend towards “tend and befriend” in our own stress management as well. But, it all starts with our innate connection to our Creator, our bodies, and nature. A woman’s power to connect is only as animated as the vitality of her own inner life, how she listens to and honors her own body’s signals, and how she syncs her life to the greater rhythm of nature around her.

When we prioritize our personal relationship to the Divine, nurturing rather than over riding our body’s, and humbly integrating to the daily, monthly, and seasonal shifts around us, we ally ourselves with the greatest forces of all.

From our connection, our undivided heart, and our connection to the Creator, we are able to transcend our own limitations and be of service. As we build our life around the value of connection, we learn that forcing—whether it’s not knowing when to let an argument rest, pushing ourselves to work when what we really need is 20 minutes of quiet to regroup, or not offering ourselves a rest until every last task is done—will kill our peace, our beauty, and our impact.

Through connection we let go of controlling so that we can enjoy the greater leverage of influence. The misuse of influence is manipulation. Manipulation is insincere and selfish. Influence is best used to nudge someone towards the choices that best serve their purpose and the general good. When we lead by being an example of connection and service, we help others step into their fullness as well.

Inspiration

When we inspire someone, we elevate them to see what they are capable of. We bring out the best in each person and elevate the environment as a whole. When we are radiant, operating from our center point, and elevating the conversation/standards for the good of the culture (of the room or of the country), we help others reach for their highest contribution and expression.

We help others shine and feel hopeful and confident in their capacity for excellence as well. People want to be at their best, and when your presence draws this out of them, they enjoy your presence. Women inspire others by being respectful of all life, nurturing those they encounter, by example and by action calling others up to their highest contribution.

Ease

When we no longer feel we must force all of our desired outcomes through sheer relentless will, we open the possibility of being a force multiplier. Surrender and the ability to receive are not passive/powerless traits but brave/impactful states of being.

When we take action in grace rather than out of fear, we are aligned with progress happening in and through us. When we trust that we will be cared for by our Creator as we take inspired action (not frenzied and reactively living our days), we find that we are lead to leveraged action and miraculous provisions.

Our ability to live in faith not fear, ease not dis-ease, is our superpower.

Of course, there are a number of other traits of elevated femininity, but these are a few key ones. When you find yourself relentlessly pushing yourself past your bodies cues for care, or trying to manipulate or force an outcome/response, or armoring your heart in interactions to protect yourself from disappointment, know that you can experiment with another way of being. It’s filled with grace, wisdom, and flow. It’s how we are meant to live. It’s women’s gift to the world to operate this way and share the bounty with all.

When we forget and return to old patterns, there’s no need to berate ourselves. Unlearning old patterns takes time. But, with each step in the direction of Grace, you will find abundant evidence that this is the way you have always wanted to be, to live, and to relate.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

“Each month you can revisit your top Being and Doing Goals and decide if they need another cycle of attention or if they are complete and you can move on to the next one.”

A Powerful New Approach for Goal Setting

Hello Beautiful,

Self respect grows when we know we can make and keep promises to ourselves and others. The better we get at this, the more confidence we build in ourselves and our relationships. When we can consistently create and achieve goals, we have a superpower and we can dream big because we know we will create micro goals that take us all the way to the finish line.

After years of studying, practicing, and consulting around goal setting, I have a unique strategy to share. It strikes the delicate balance between creating a compelling goal and sustaining progress at a level that doesn’t end in burnout and abandoning the whole thing.

The first step is to make an annual goals “wishlist”. Here you are going to write an unrealistic but comprehensive list of all that you aspire to. After you have written it all out, break it into 2 Broad categories: To Do and To Be .

In the To Do section, you can put personal projects, trips, career growth, home projects, financial goals, etc.. These goals require time, money, professional assistance, and freedom.

Saving or earning a certain amount, remodeling, international travel, and photo organization are all good examples of “doing” goals.

In the To Be section includes character growth and personal habits. These goals can be accomplished with no outside support. They are free and only dependent on your awareness and consistent efforts. Being more compassionate, going to bed earlier, improving your posture, breathing with awareness, and being on time are all good examples.

After bringing all goals to the table, take some time to reflect about your top 10 “Doing” goals and your top 5 “Being” goals. The Being goals are fewer because that level of change is more demanding.

We have 13 lunar cycles a year and for an average of 30 years, women have 13 periods per year. I take each menstrual cycle and pick one “Being” goal and 2-3 doing goals to focus on. I do this for 21 days. That gives me the last week to reflect on the next cycle and pause for review.

Earlier this year, several consecutive months had the “Being” goal to talk 50% less at home. I wanted to increase my being heard by being more selective and concise in my communication. I found it highly effective for improving this! Some of my doing goals included: doing 50 jump squats per day, reading a chapter of a book each day, organizing the storage room, creating and cooking a new seasonal meal rotation, and traveling.

Each month you can revisit your top Being and Doing Goals and decide if they need another cycle of attention or if they are complete and you can move on to the next one. If you do this for 13 consecutive cycles, at the end of a year, you will have made significant progress. I find that having my goals “chunked” in this way prevents overwhelm and keeps momentum going.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

“Our skin is a sacred and precious robe we wear each day. It’s never too late to improve your skin with upgraded habits.”

 2 Skincare Secrets That Help Turn Back the Clock

Hello Beautiful,

One of the topics women are most interested in is how to help their skin age well. The desire to have beautiful skin is universal. Radiant, healthy, comfortable skin is more than a matter of vanity, it indicates our health in surprising ways and functions as part of our immune system. Today, I want to share 2 skincare secrets that help turn back the clock. Both are vital to having soft, radiant, firm, and smooth skin at any age.

#1 Increasing skin fitness through specialized dry brushing:

Regular dry brushing stimulates the production of collagen in the skin. It also removes the dead skin that builds up allowing the easier release of sweat through the skin and the absorption of nourishment applied topically to the skin. The website thegoldensecrets.com  sells an ionic copper dry brush that (according to the research and consistent with my experience) also helps reset the electromagnetic charge of the body by stimulating the release of negatively charged ionic particles, thus optimizing the bodies electromagnetic field.

I have been using this body brush 4-6x per week for 6 months with exponential benefits. My skin is softer than ever and the overall tone and luminosity is increased. It also reduces water retention and cellulite. Did I say that it feels amazing as well? If you have a traditional dry brush, keep using it and reap the benefits. But, if you are interested in upgrading, I can attest to the value of this specialty item. It’s a top 5 beauty purchase in my opinion.

Please be gentle with your pressure, especially at first (and always attentive to your skin’s feedback on the pressure and duration of your scrubbing). With consistent use, this form of skin massage increase the tone of your skin (as circulation increases and collagen production builds). This often leads to the tightening of loose skin and an enhanced youthful tone in the skin. I have been shocked at the results I have felt and seen. Perhaps you will have similar results.

#2 The value of using skin oils more often than moisturizers

Dry skin ages more quickly and looks older than well moisturized skin. After years of research, personal experimentation, and working with women from diverse backgrounds, the evidence for the consistent use of skin oils has mounted. At night I like to layer (onto my face and neck) a skin oil over my night serum and then massage the oil in with my fingers or massage it in with my gua sha. In the morning I use a moisturizer instead of an oil over my serum.

On my body, I apply organic sweet almond oil or jojoba oil to gently towel dried skin that’s a bit moist. Apply the oil with massaging strokes from the shoulders down to the tops of your feet. I let it soak in and then add a lotion (a lighter one in the summer and a richer one in the cooler months) to areas that need additional moisture. I like to moisturize my shoulders, elbows, knees and ankles with this extra layer year round.

When I take a hot bath, I also add about a tablespoon of body oil to the water to keep my skin from loosing moisture and dying out from the water. Just be cautious when leaving the tub since the oil can make the tub slippery. You’ll want to do a quick clean of the tub between baths to remove the oil for safety when using the tub again.

Body oil permeates the skin more deeply and more effectively nourishes the skin. If you take the time to massage it in gently but firmly, you will further increase the body’s receptivity to the moisture. Lovingly massaging your skin while thinking positive thoughts about your body (rather than being self critical) is a key component of achieving good results. Just like a plant you speak to lovingly flourishes, your body responds to loving attention with more vitality.

Our skin is the doorway between the world and our being. It is a sacred and precious robe we wear each day we live. It’s never too late to improve your skin with upgraded habits. When we nurture our skin, our skin transforms into a more beautiful expression of our health. I hope you feel inspired to care more skillfully for your skin and that you feel and see the difference it makes.

I would love to work with you and personalize a nutrition and skincare regime that helps you look and feel your best. If you are ready to invest in your longterm health and beauty, reach out!

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you’d like some support on your journey, let’s talk. Click here for details

“The essence of style is how you live your life.” – Oscar De La Renta

3 Keys to Living Well

Hello Beautiful,

One of the most common areas I coach women around is their desire to bring more grace and ease into their lives. Often, we have so many responsibilities and schedules we are working with that it can feel overwhelming and drain our joy. But, there is another way! Your life can be characterized by ease, grace, and delight. When you feel like the passenger on a wild ride rather than the driver of your dream car, it’s an opportunity to reset. Here are some tools to help you live in the flow.

Clarify

Our hearts are often bigger than our schedules. We can feel pulled towards many worthy causes and in total they become too heavy. I believe our first responsibility is to deepen our connection to our Creator every day. That ever deepening connection is the greatest thing we can invest our lives in. As we do, we are lead intuitively to make choices that bring increase to every are of our lives and exponential growth towards all of our goals.

Starting our day with quiet, tech free connection time to listen, to pray, and to fill our minds and hearts with inspiration is a key practice. We then have a clear sense that we must follow and protect. When we become aggravated, anxious, or overwhelmed, we can choose to revisit the Source and to reconnect for perspective and direction.

All day, we keep noticing the cues in our body and our mind that indicate if we are acting out of love and faith or from fear and forcing things. As we continue to hone our listening skills in our mind and our body, we will more quickly notice when we are loosing connection and swiftly course correct.

Living deeply connected to the Divine is the ultimate ease. We know that we aren’t in control, we are simply in devotional living. Our only priority is to see where God is working in a person, a situation, or our heart, and to lean in. That single focus brings clarity to each moment.

Be Realistic

Wishful thinking gets us all in trouble. When we imagine we can say yes to everything and that there will be no traffic, no delays, and no unexpected needs to meet, we set ourselves up for stress. It’s wise to pad our time estimates by 20%+. We need to get ready earlier so we aren’t rushing out the door in disarray. If we allow an extra 15 minutes it can be the difference between leaving with everything prepared for a successful day and having several things go askew because we were too flustered to remember the details needed. Preparation brings peace. Allow the extra time for yourself to gather what is needed for your day.

We are wise to plan extra travel time so we aren’t stressed by the traffic conditions. We may need to delay or delegate 1/3 of our current commitments to realign with a realistic schedule. We are aiming towards a way of living where we can do one thing at a time with excellence and presence as a norm. Being realistic is an essential skill in creating the necessary pace for such an experience.

Add Beauty

Try to add one lovely component to each thing you do. Plate your meals and sit with a cloth napkin and placemat to enjoy your meal. Wear something you feel gorgeous in. Light a candle while you complete a household task. Add a please and thank you to your interactions. Offer encouragement to everyone you interact with. Take 30 seconds between tasks to gaze out of the window and notice something beautiful in nature. Noticing beauty and enhancing each moment with the choice to add beauty to it is a habit and a skill. When we do this, we leave everyone and everything better with our interactions.

Our world needs beauty more than ever. We have lost the aspirational and are mired in the lowest common denominator. Elevating life is something that gives us all a moment of uplift and re-orients us to the best in ourselves, each other, and the world. The ripple effect of such choices helps heal the heartache we all face and provides a respite. Beauty nurtures our being on every level. It heals us by bringing us back to the present and finding delights (however small) to raise our gaze to what is possible.

If we gradually refine our approach to life with these three keys, we will live a dramatically different life. We are given the gift of life and it doesn’t have to feel like a weight. Gaining clarity, setting boundaries, creating new patterns, and changing our default thought patterns will all work in concert to help us redesign our way of living.

Living well is the ultimate expression of creativity. A life designed with care and strategy is more efficient and more fulfilling with less effort. As Oscar De La Renta said “The essence of style is how you live your life”.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you’d like some support on your journey, let’s talk. Click here for details

“Do you need more fasting or more feasting? Both are needed to live well and thrive.”

What I eat in a day

Hello Sisters,

With the arrival of Spring, we often crave a shift in routine. We want to revitalize habits and shake up old patterns. We feel a desire to bring change to stagnant areas of our lives. One area we all can get stuck in is… menu planning. I hope this blog helps you find a few new ideas to enliven your daily routine with nourishing, yet simple shifts. Here’s to your most vibrant season yet!

What I Eat In a Day

Hydrate and Balance PH + Electrolytes

6:30am 1 liter of room temperature water with LMNT electrolytes added

7:30 am 12 oz water + the juice of 1 lemon + 2 tsp green powder (Welleco Super Elixir)

9:30 am Breakfast

• a fruit and seed bowl:
  • 1/2 pomegranate seeds + 1/2 cup wild blueberries+ 3 T. Pumpkin seeds and cinnamon

• a superfood Matcha Latte
  • 1 Tsp, Nekohama brand matcha powder + 6 oz water + 6 oz macadamia milk+ 1/2 tsp Pearl  Beauty powder by Longevity Power + 3 drops vanilla Stevia sweetener—warmed and blended until frothy

• a bowl of boiled millet topped with coconut butter, cinnamon, chopped pecans and a drizzle of maple syrup helps fill me up if I’m feeling extra hungry.

Mid-Morning Hydration

I drink a second liter of LMNT enhanced water

12:45 lunch

• a simple stir fry with salmon. Usually 3-4 c. fresh or frozen vegetables sautéed in broth. I combine 3-4 types of vegetables. A current favorite blend is green beans, red bell pepper, and artichoke hearts. Next, I add wild caught salmon (pre-cooked) and drizzle with Sesame oil and Coconut Aminos ( a soy sauce substitute). It’s colorful, delicious, and satisfying.

• 1/4 cup of HU chocolate nuggets is a nice dessert afterwards.

3:30 Porch date with my son calls for a fruit popsicle or non-dairy ice cream bar

Mid-Afternoon Hydration

I drink a 3rd liter of LMNT enriched water throughout the afternoon

6 Family Dinner

• Large salad with at least 4 kinds of vegetables + baked sweet potato topped with sea salt and pasture butter + buffalo meat balls

Overall Framework of my Meal Planning

• I usually eat between 9:30am-6:30 pm.

• I do a 24-36 hr fast every 7-10 days.

• I listen to my body and eat intuitively. Some days I eat lightly and vegan. Other days I eat richer foods and animal products.

• It’s important to do metabolic HIIT training—ie. vary how much we eat and how much we exercise. This is done within the framework of listening to our body’s signals for rest, for movement, and for satiation or a fast.

• I aim for 7-10 cups of organic fresh produce daily.

• I limit gluten and dairy but I love my “exceptions”. Fresh naan bread, Vicolo pizza, honey infused goat cheese, and whipped cream are a few treats I enjoy from time to time.

As you refine your meals, I hope I have given you some inspiration and a basic framework to guide you towards your Spring meal rotation. Give yourself permission to try something new and to switch up your habits. Listen to your body’s feedback. Do you need more fasting or more feasting? Both are needed to live well and thrive.

When we feed ourselves with care, we feel our best. Our body’s needs change over time and it’s important that we are responsive to meet those changing needs. Learning your body’s language is a key life skill. Our body’s are our first gift and our daily companion on the journey. It’s a privilege to have a body and a sacred task to care for it well.

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you’d like some support on your journey, let’s talk. Click here for details

“Self care isn’t selfish—it’s strategic. Fill your tank with the fuel you need to go the distance!”

Why Your Physical Health Matters to Your Spiritual Growth

Hello Sisters,

As we enter Spring and the delight of new life surrounds us, here are some musings on how our growth as a Being transfer between realms. I am sometimes asked about my thoughts on how our health effects our spiritual growth. It’s an important question and one with some nuance. I want to share some thoughts on this important topic with you.

Facing where we are immature or hurtful is not something most humans embrace. In fact, most people will go to great lengths to ignore or redirect any attempts to face where they are falling short of the mark. Fear of punishment, fear of abandonment, and fear of change are common reasons people cannot look at what is so obvious to those around us. For these reasons, many people stop growing or loose intimacy in their relationships. Change is hard for most people.

Ironically, if we are able to take responsibility, express remorse, and commit to change, most people will gain respect for us. Someone brave enough to be honest and vulnerable is someone we instinctively trust. Courage and humility are a winning combination that we all know is grounded in strength. Change takes a deeper commitment to healing than to protecting our ego.

The thing is, when we are exhausted and overcommitted, have a headache and feel bloated, we have a  much harder time doing the HARD work of looking at the unflattering truths. We are more likely to persist with our old stories and unfruitful (but ingrained) patterns. The ones we choose to believe because they are more flattering than the truth is. We naively hope others will buy the lie we are selling ourselves.

When we send a basic “signal of safety” to our nervous systems by listening to and taking care of our bodies, we feel more grounded in our being. When aren’t distracted by basic exhaustion and discomfort, we can better face (and embrace!) the lessons we need to. The energy of health is a currency that can be used to fuel growth.

Years ago, our family had a small business we ran on nights and weekends. While it had many benefits to the community and the expression of our own gifts, it took away all of our free time. When we decided to close down the venture, the floodgates of growth took place on so many fronts. We simply had the time and energy to do that deeper work.

So, yes, our health is a form of fuel for our spiritual growth. We “burn the fuel” of our physical life force in service of our spiritual and emotional growth. Then we assimilated and standardize that level of being and “refuel” our physical reserves. Only to leap frog forward from the resources we have built up. The body serves as a reservoir of “change potential” energy from which we can draw.

Personally, I have been in a very deep season of growth and transformation. I feel I am near a plateau of integration that will then let me redirect my energy to “next leveling” my body….in preparation for drawing from that vitality on my next ascent.

I have a lifelong commitment to health for many reasons, but the primary one is this: taking care of my body is taking care of my Spirit. There is no split. Our emotions express through our body. Our thoughts happen in a tired and depressed brain or a refreshed and faith filled brain. Our ability to “go the extra mile” is effected by how depleted we are.

I want to build up my physical capacity to carry my Spirit as far as she can go (and then by Grace, even farther than I knew possible). I want to support and inspire you to do the same. You are a one of a kind expression of God’s love and a unique contribution to the world. Self care isn’t selfish—it’s strategic. Fill your tank with the fuel you need to go the distance!

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you’d like some support on your journey, let’s talk. Click here for details.

“Even when we feel surprised or upset about being out of commission, in some way it is serving us. When we stop fighting it and start learning from the situation, healing can begin.”

Three Overlooked Reasons You might be Sick or Injured

Hello Sisters,

We all get sick or injured from time to time. I don’t see this as accidental. Our body responds elegantly to our thoughts, emotions, and actions. Even when we feel surprised or upset about being out of commission, in some way it is serving us. When we stop fighting and start learning from the situation, healing can begin. Here are 3 common patters from my studies and observations over the decades, that I use personally and with my clients to get to the root of the issue so that the healing process can truly begin.

#1 Our Chemistry is out of balance

When we eat too many refined and acidic foods, our mineral balance/ph is out of the balanced ph range of 6.75-7.5. When this happens, our microbiome is compromised and immunity is lowered. We are also more prone to injury because acidic ph inhibits optimal signaling in the muscles/nerves and makes us more prone to injury. While coffee, alcohol, sodas, sweets, simple carbs, and too much meat are common culprits, stress is equally problematic. If we are under chronic stress, our body is subject to cortisol, adrenaline, and other stress response hormones that shift our ph out of its healthy range. 

What is needed, is a large amount of fresh vegetables (green juice is especially potent) and an elimination of highly acidic foods until the proper ph is regained. The body heals more quickly when an anti inflammatory diet of whole foods dominates. Additionally, slowing down our breath (and deepening/extending the exhale in particular), our movements (slower and softer movements cue safety to the nervous system), and our schedules will help normalize the ph. Difficult conversations may need to be had. Forgiveness will help clear the system. Boundaries may need to be set or re-iterated. Amends may need to be made. Healing our body, our emotions, and our spirit are all equally important.

#2 Being Unavailable Because of Your Injury or Illness May Be a Way to Not Engage 

It’s easier to “not be able to go” than to say you choose not to. Sometimes illnesses (whether acute or chronic) are avoidance mechanisms for things we resist doing but feel obligated to do—-unless our body is out of commission. It’s alway helpful to ask, “What is this illness/injury allowing me to bow out of that I don’t really want to do?” See if anything comes to mind. Prepare to have that conversation so you can be healthy AND not do the thing. 

#3 We aren’t listening to our body’s communication to slow down, so it shut’s down for a bit.

When we push too hard for too long our body will resist by not functioning in some way. This is a natural protective mechanism to bring us back into balance. The lesson here is to slow down voluntarily rather than be pushed off the cliff by a tire that blows out! We all have to accept our limits (however inconvenient that reality feels) and slow down when our vehicle is overheating. Poor sleep, bad moods, low energy, and upset digestion can all cue us to slow down and take care before things escalate further.

Our body is wonderfully designed. We are wise to listen to it, to care for it, and to learn from it. Don’t fight your body, partner with it. Treat it gently, drive it with attentive appreciation. It will last longer and the ride will be much more pleasant. Our bodies aren’t burdens. They aren’t malfunctioning machines. They are elegant and instructive teachers if we will listen well. We can learn a lot from our illness and injuries. They can usher in important realizations and life shifts that bring us into truer alignment. Greater health and more clarity can be the fruit of a carefully understood bodily reset. You see? Everything is conspiring to bring you into your fullness!

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you’d like some support on your journey, let’s talk. Click here for details.