No one will keep you healthy but you. You have to prioritize and habitualize what serves your long term interest. Every habit you uplevel is a gift to your future self. Love Her. Give Her a healthy and beautiful body to live in.

4 Keys to being your best in 2024

Hello Beautiful,

I am often asked which habits make the biggest difference in aging well. While there is no magic lever (it’s more of a large dashboard of levers to adjust skillfully over time), several habits have exponential value in increasing your vitality over the long run. Here are a few of the most essential habits:

#1 Getting a Lot of Greens

I aim for 36oz of green liquid per day. It’s usually 12oz of water/greens superfood powder first thing in the morning, then a midmorning ceremonial grade (ultra high anti-oxidant) matcha tea (Nekohama brand), and a mid afternoon green juice. I also average a small salad at lunch and a mixed vegetable soup or stir-fry at dinner.

Eating a lot of greens is key to aging slowly for several reasons.The Chlorophyll in green foods is a blood purifier. The minerals in the vegetables aid in optimal function of all organs and tissues. The alkalinity of the greens helps balance the body’s chemistry to reduce inflammation.

The fiber improves gut health and elimination. And the high water content of the vegetables gets hydration into the cells efficiently, which helps you *glow*.

#2 Quieting the Mind

Our thoughts are the main source of stress in our life. Not our circumstances, but our thoughts. Our mind is always telling us a story about our experience. Research shows that for the average person 80% of our thoughts are negative!

If we have 80% negative (frustrated, powerless, critical, and angry thoughts) thoughts, we are flooding our body with cortisol and other inflammatory chemicals. We are seeing the world through a lens that isn’t constructive. We may need to set boundaries, change circumstances, or alter relationship patterns to improve our life.

In order to do that, we need to see clearly what our options are and what changes we are responsible to make. If we are stuck in the same thought patterns, we will not be able to see our options. Learning to quiet the mind allows us to get out of our habituated perceptions and reactions.

We can then see more clearly, hear Divine guidance, and begin to reprogram our mind towards constructive thoughts, rather than a negativity bias. The fountain of youth is likely situated between your ears….it’s where change begins.

#3 Jumping and Agility Training

Sarcopenia (loss of muscle mass) is the first sign of aging. We especially tend to loose more Type 2 muscle fibers with each year in midlife and beyond. These fibers are responsible for acceleration and deceleration. When we jump, we access this explosive power and preserve these muscle fibers.

I do jump squats, lateral jumping exercises, and use my rebounder often. When we add a co-ordination component (aka Agility training) we engage our proprioception (knowing and controlling where we are in space), our co-ordination, and our ability to recover from being off balance and regain stability.

In combination, these skills will give us a solid foundation to reduce the risk of falls (and the associated risk of injury/hospitalization) as we age. They also build bone density and help us move with more assurance and grace.

#4 Jade Egg Pelvic Floor Training

Few people experience notable improvement to their pelvic floor with Kegel exercises. There are several reasons for this.

Firstly, it’s common for people to do them incorrectly, bearing down rather than drawing up with the contractions. Secondly, squeezing and releasing a muscle set is a very limited way to build strength anywhere in your body. Lastly, without adding weight and a tool to build proprioception (your accurate sense of muscle use and co-ordination), you won’t change any muscles in your body very much.

The use of the Jade Egg at first, is to build co-ordination of the muscles in the pelvic floor and build a baseline of strength. And then, we use the jade egg with weights added (to increase strength, build muscle, increase blood flow, and regenerate tissue).

If you want to do jumping and agility training, you may need to do this step first! All women should be able to run and jump without leaking urine, lubricate well from within (even at midlife and beyond), and avoid or rehabilitate pelvic organ prolapse. If you want instruction on this practice, please look into my course Sensuous Strength.

No one will keep you healthy but you. You have to prioritize and habitualize what serves your long term interest. Every habit you up level is a gift to your future self. Love Her. Give Her a healthy and beautiful body to live in.

Invest in your future body like you do in your retirement investment account. Creating wonderful habits builds “health capital” for your future. There is no time like the present to begin again or to take your health to the next level.

If you want support in your journey, try one of my courses or work with me personally. I would love to help you break through to the next level of awesome!

Cheering You On!

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

No healing can happen outside of radical honesty. If you can’t bear to hear the truth. You aren’t ready to heal.

All Healing is Relational

Hello Beautiful,

I hope your holidays have been full of joy and connection! Remember to give yourself extra rest and choose to prioritize simplicity as we are now firmly in the season of rest. Winter is a time of paring down. Just as nature has shed her lovely leaves and blossoms in exchange for deepening her roots, you are meant to do the same.

It takes courage to do that. Everything around us re enforces the idea that being relevant and potent is linked to our constant engagement with information and with activity. But, how true is this? The Divine design shows us that there is only so much we can grow above ground in a year. We see this growth in Spring and Summer.

What we don’t see, but is equally part of the growth cycle, is the growth below ground that happens in the rest seasons of Fall and Winter. The roots are expanding and deepening. Anchoring and integration are happening.

We are wise to value the inner work of intentional rest. It is  important to differentiate this from the distraction/entertainment most people consider their “down time”. Rest is a reduction in stimulus for the purpose of regeneration and integration.

Entertainment is taking in sights and sounds to experience (virtually while watching or listening to programs or in person- in a playing games) something. Both entertainment and rest have value. Our culture conflates the two into one thing-entertainment-and puts little or no value on true rest.

Healing requires rest. If you or a loved one has ever had a significant illness to heal, rest is one of the key ingredients to do so. Rest allows the rebuilding and reflection needed to heal. Healing is not done in isolation. Healing is always the reconnection of systems within the body to one another.

For example, a build up of lymphatic fluid needs to be in proper relationship with the rest of the body. The lymphatic fluid needs to be moved into the circulatory system so that it can properly be circulated and released from the body.

I am always helping clients see how healing is about balancing a relationship. It might be a relationship between yourself and rest that has been imbalanced. It might be a relationship that has been compromised around a lack of healthy boundaries.

It might be poor boundaries with yourself around when to stop (eating/drinking/talking/working) or in relationship with another person or in staying true to yourself in a particular type of situation.

Healing requires the ability to be part of the whole (within a body, within a relationship, within a community) yet not abandon your specific function (as an organ, as a woman, as a citizen). The balance between your individuality and your roll within the larger context is key.

Healing relationships takes courage. Few people are willing to pay the price to heal. We must face our personal responsibility and the ultimatum of change rather than nuzzle into the hypnotizing lure of a quick fix or blaming others.

Rather than getting a cosmetic procedure, we can address the cause of the muscular contraction (which is both psychological and physical—i.e. muscular gripping from the upper back and neck traveling up the back of the occipital ridge and scalp… that manifests visually as a wanted facial lines). Just like headaches often worsen with cosmetic fillers/injections, our underlying tension, when not addressed, just compounds.

In interpersonal relationships this looks like having the courageous conversations. Asking “is there anything I have done that hurt you, that when you think about it, still hurts you?” Is a good start.

Being willing to hear the answer, not justify or explain, and offer a sincere apology— is something we have to be willing to do if we want to clear the “film” in our closest relationships. Healing the unspoken wounds makes intimacy possible. Relationships require this kind of maintenance over time in order to stay clear and vital.

I have had these conversations this year with my family. At times it was difficult to hear the answer. It was a very courageous thing. I am proud that I did, how I handled it, and especially of the immensely positive impact that level of courage, humility, and unconditional love had on the relationships.

Not asking, not knowing, not owning our part, and not demonstrating willingness to change will only keep you “safe” in perpetuating a distance where intimacy isn’t possible. Without intimacy, relationships are burdensome rather than life giving.

No healing can happen outside of radical honesty. If you can’t bear to hear the truth. You aren’t ready to heal. All healing is relational. Nothing is truly healed without the courage to right a relationship. The body’s symptoms can be “managed” but with a list of ongoing side effects. A relationship can limp along, avoiding key areas of tension, but it won’t be healthy. It, too, will be managed.

Are you tired of “managing”? Managing is exhausting! It’s an endless shuffle of pills, injections, and relational avoidance. What is the alternative? The courage to face the root causes of the ailment is required. This is not a quick fix but it’s a true fix. You will heal many peripheral issues along the way.

You will gain expanding levels of health, rather than the slow march into powerlessness in relationship to your body. You will gain true and deep connections with your loved ones. You will look people in the eye with depth because you are right within your Soul. You have done the key work, not just to appear better, but to be more whole.

I want this for you in 2024. If you are interested in doing this work with the help of a mentor, I would love to work with you one on one. If you are interested in a group coaching offering, reply to this email and let me known that you would like to be a part of this in the coming year.

However you decide to pursue this root cause, relational healing, know that you have a cheerleader in me. I celebrate your courage, your resolve, your openness, and your love. We need you to do this work, and to help heal yourself, your relationships, and our world.

In Reverence,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details

Maybe it’s time to face the uncomfortable question of who you are outside of your sacrifices, your work, and your résumé of exemplary endurance.

Is this why you are feeling burned out?

Hello Beautiful,

As I have worked to balance my own tendency to overwork, and as I have helped my brave and brilliant clients rewire their patterns, a common thread has emerged. And, it’s not about getting more organized, nor can it be reduced to the need to scale back our schedules in hopes of finding some much needed downtime. The real reason is much more pernicious and it’s hidden behind a deep wound….

The reason most of us have struggled to stop over committing and over scheduling is that we are afraid our work is our worth. Simply telling someone to “get more strategic” or “more realistic with their time use” is missing the true sticking point. After decades of proving your worth through your work, a wise slogan won’t help you make the breakthrough your weary soul is longing for.

The very real need to feel loved and valued is being “protected” by your constant struggle (or your lived resignation) to keep swimming. You probably feel like you cannot (realistically) do anything differently. Yeah, sure, when —the kids are older/your financial situation improves/relational challenges subside—you will finally be in a situation with less resistance and you can make a few changes. That time never really comes.

But there is also the inner critic that secretly judges others who’s lives on shore seem too easy. We only have a few people to judge in this category- because most everyone is nearly being swept away by the current! We take some consolation that, although we are living in or near the border of burnout, at least we are super responsible, highly capable, and doing the right thing in our many commitments.

We likely came from a family, and especially a mother line, of people who could really bear down and make things happen. We have taken pride in, and formed our identity around, being the one most capable in the group. The one who could hold it together and soldier on no matter what life threw at her.

And I want to bow and say, “Well done. You did it. You proved it beyond the shadow of a doubt. Your “soldier on” muscles are impressive. They have carried you through many dark nights of the soul and gotten you here in one piece. I am proud of your endurance and discipline. Now it’s time for those muscles to take a rest. It’s time to develop the complimentary strength of healing, integration (on a deep level) of the lessons learned in the battles you fought, and turning that pain you endured into wisdom. Virtue comes in many forms—not just being the Martyr through every decade of life.

Maybe it’s time to face the uncomfortable question of who you are outside from your sacrifices, your work, and your résumé of exemplary  endurance. You may feel, that when you try to answer that question, you don’t have much to say.

You may feel that your work is and always will be your worth. If you couldn’t do anything for anyone from this day forward, how would you feel about yourself? Sister, you probably have accomplished a lot already. But, you likely are just getting started with what you can contribute to your family, community, and work.

That is why I want to offer: that it’s not an either/or choice. You can make great contributions, in a richly engage life. You can also live differently. You really can. A key component is the fuel you are burning as you live your days.

I call living from fear, duty, and emptiness burning dirty fuel. It clogs the engine it claims to deify- as the only possible way to live. It robs you of your joy. The years pass and you lose your spark.

“Dirty fuels that clog your engine”

fear-No one else will do it if I don’t!

duty-Feeling dragged along by life’s prior commitments.

  emptiness-If you stop, who will you be and how will you find value?

Instead, we want to burn clean fuel that let’s our engine run longer, cooler, and sustainably. Also, we can actually enjoy the journey! What is clean fuel and how do we live from it’s power? We need to balance purpose with pleasure, rest with activity, and assimilating our life’s experiences with creating new ones.

We aren’t choosing between a selfish life and one of service. We are choosing a life of Presence, peace, and power. We are far more impactful in our actions and our interactions when we have taken the time to prepare our hearts.

We prepare our hearts by pausing daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, annually! We build reflection (time with no inputs: not reading or listening to anything….silence), digestion (reflection in journaling and/or the counsel of wise people around us), and then making a considered plan of action.

We then live from this plan. It is a plan where we put first things first and then let the rest find a spot in good time. We create space in the morning to tune ourselves to the Divine chord. We set said time in the evening to learn from the experiences of the day and to digest them in our Being before letting them go to Grace as we rest for the night.

We re pattern our weekends to have time for honoring what was done well, learning from where we missed it, and being receptive to direction for the week to come. An hour or two is optimal, but start with less if you need to.

You may think, “Rachel, that all sounds lovely, but you don’t understand my life. I cannot realistically live like that. Although it sounds nice, it’s out of reach in my current life circumstance.”

I will tell you, from my experience over 20 years of working with women who were saying the same thing— until life knocked them over hard enough, that they were open to seeing things they couldn’t see before—that you are spending more time “cleaning up” or being injuring by your current default state, than you will spend in this pause and plan approach.

If you don’t take the time to consider your strategy and it’s sustainability, you will be overwhelmed and exhausted by responding to the way life unfolds. The first step is to believe that something different could work for you—and better than what you are currently doing. And, to begin renewing your mental patterning that conflates struggle with value.

When we choose effective action, balanced with replenishment, we are able to have the impact we crave to contribute as well as the wholeness of health, peace, and Presence. I want that for you!

Cheering you on,

Rachel

ps. If you would like to work with me to help you reach your goals, get more information here: Click here for details